Film review: wolverine

plot

If you've seen any of the previous X-Men movies—or read enough of the comics—then you already know where this is going. Our boy Logan, a.k.a. Wolverine, wasn't always equipped with that adamantium skeleton. In this episode, we're going to see exactly how he wound up with it. Although, again, if you've seen any of the previous movies, you already know that he was involved in some sort of super-top-secret-government-project-gone-awry that he escaped from and then forgot about. In a nutshell: Logan (who used to be called "Jimmy?") and his half-brother, Victor, run away from home after Logan mistakenly kills his father, and after growing up to around thirty-ish, live forever and fight in pretty much every major war from then to now. Then they join a gang of assassins, who just like to kill people, but then Logan (being the good guy) throws in the towel and decides to live a nice, quiet life in Canada. Until Victor (who's now calling himself Sabretooth, by the way) kills his girlfriend and starts him on the epic revenge spree that eventually lands him in the Weapon X Program. And that, kids, is how the Wolverine got his claws.

Look, the plot is secondary. If you're going to see this movie because you want to know how Wolverine became Wolverine, you're missing the point, regardless of the title. This is an action movie, plain and simple. Don't expect any Earth-shattering revelations about the character's past, or any hugely significant connections to his current life apart from the obvious, or a lot of plot continuity on the whole. (Did the writers forget we've met Sabretooth already? And that he wasn't Logan's brother? Are they both amnesiacs or what? Don't even get me started on Cyclops.)

Do expect brief, flashy cameos of some of the comic franchise's most beloved characters, some fantastic set pieces, sweet action sequences, and a truckload of explody special effects. And not much else. The only thing here that passes for true dramatic tension is Logan's strained relationship with Sabretooth, but all that amounts to is three—count 'em, three—lengthy fight scenes in which neither of them dies. Because, y'know, that's their power. They can't die. Yeah. One wonders what either of them was trying to accomplish. "You killed my girlfriend!" *smash* "You're nothing but an animal!" *slice* It gets old pretty fast. And it happens three times. Including the big finale, in which—again—neither of them dies. Seriously, we've already seen both of them in the first movie—what did you think was going to happen?

Now, having said that, I thoroughly enjoyed this. It was predictable and easy to follow, with plenty of pretty men beating the snot out of each other, which is what all superhero movies should be, after all. I was not disappointed, but my expectations were not high. I kinda wondered how he'd lose his memory—surely getting bonked in the head wouldn't do it?—but when I found out there answer, I didn't really buy it. But again, it doesn't matter. We know what's going to happen. We're here for the gratuitous eye candy and style points, not the answers to any burning questions about Wolverine's past.

Acting

Hugh Jackman is so connected to this character, it sometimes takes me a while to remember what he looks like without the lamb chops. He can lay down a berserker rage without the benefit of CGI—or without a stitch of clothes on—and look good doing it. It may look like he doesn't have much to do here, but being a badass and a sensitive sweetheart—sometimes in the same scene—isn't something everyone can pull off. Liev Schreiber has been well praised in general for his part, but really he's just Wolverine without the good guy hero side. I was not impressed.

I was excited when I saw Dominic Monaghan on the cast list—he plays Bradley, a mutant who can control electricity—but his first scene screamed "red shirt" so I gave up on him quickly. Also among the newcomers are rapper Will.i.Am. as John Wraith (a teleporter who has the same power as Nightcrawler from movie two, but who's counting?); Lynn Collins as Kayla Silverfox (she has a power, but mostly she's the girlfriend); and Danny Huston as William Stryker (the same anti-mutant science freak from movie two, inexplicably recast, but again, who's counting?). Ryan Reynolds is here too, as a katana-flipping mutant named Wade Wilson, but so is Daniel Henney as Agent Zero, who eventually becomes Weapon XI. I'm told that one or both of these characters is known as "Deadpool" in the comics, but as the movie doesn't list either of them as such, I don't know which is which. There's a possibility they split the character in two—continuity, thin on the ground.

But the one I really want to talk about is Taylor Kitsch as Remy LeBeau, a.k.a. Gambit, a mutant thief who can charge inanimate objects (he favors playing cards and a cane) with telekinetic energy, and make them explode. He's the one superfans have been salivating over since they saw the trailer. The bad news is what you've seen in the trailer is all you'll be seeing of him. His part is that small. Plus, his famous accent has morphed from Cajun to Generically Southern, which superfans consider an unforgivable offense. However, I came to this for the eye candy, and canon-be-damned, the boy is yummy. And if the internet reaction I've seen to him so far is any indication, I'm not alone. I wish I could talk more about "acting" in this section, but the characters apart from Wolverine have so little to do, there's not much to tell.

Verdict: Could've been better, and there'll to be Hell to pay from the Marvel elitists, but it's still entertaining enough to be worth seeing on the big screen.

Laurel